Scrooge vs The Grinch
'''Scrooge vs The Grinch '''is a rap battle and the only one uploaded on the channel TheCrossingChurch. It is between the two biggest Christmas misers, Charles Dickens character Ebenezer Scrooge and Dr. Seuss character The Grinch and was uploaded on December 2, 2012 under the gimmick of "Epic Rap Battles of Christmas." Cast Ben Saffrin as The Grinch Drew Eid as Ebenezer Scrooge Bryan Durushia as Tiny Tim Ted Snyder as Santa Claus Payton Eid as Elf Lyrics The Grinch Hold on to your hats yeah, you better listen up! I'm about to drop bombs on your Cindy Lou Who butts! Christmas is stupid, that endless mountain of toys, Spoiled little brats and all that noise, noise, noise! I'm the master of evil, I've got a beautiful plan! Me and my dog Max are going to rip the joy from this land! I'm the Grinch, and I'm here to steal Christmas! I'm vicious, ambitious, and I'm coming for your wish list! You're on my hit list, all you Whoville Who's, When I steal all your toys and make the front page news! No one hates Christmas more than me, It's a truth, it's a fact, it's reality! Scrooge What's this I hear from a slimy green punk? Those rhymes and I quote, stink, stank, stunk! Everyone knows I'm the classic yuletide miser! Compared to me, you're some kind of holiday sympathizer! You think you're evil, but true evil has class! It's all about the bling, cha-ching, the dough and the cash! Three piece suit and I'm rocking this scarf! You're covered in rags and your breath reeks of barf! Crawl in a hole and decrease the surplus populous! The fact is this business is for the fiscally meticulous! How can you claim to be evil when you dress like St. Nicholas? You're not even wearing pants, that's absolutely ridiculous! The Grinch That get up's got nothing on my costume, tailored green and red! You should go and quit the bank scene and be a carnie instead! What the Dickens are you thinking wearing a sweater dress to bed? Who does that? Only people who are messed up in the head. Your old, your hips would break if you fell! That arthritis has set, joints have started to swell! How are those varicose veins, are they treating you well? People say I stink, but everyone knows that old person smell! Evil is for treasures and collectors, don't give me those lectures! Evil is found in the heart and mine has obvious defectures, And quit trying to bore me with your stupid ghost adventures! Go back to bed and don't forget to soak your dentures! Scrooge You're a mean one but I'm about to get meaner! I'll kick an orphan off my doorstep just to make it a little cleaner! I'm a true Ebenezer, sick flow that will make you greener! I'm gonna pop, lock and drop it with a British demeanor! Even though it's midwinter, I can still make it rain! Your only friend is a dog and you live in a cave, fool! Yes I'll admit, I've had a haunting or two, But when my fist haunt your head, I'll make a ghost out of you! Wash that ugly off your face and you should start brushing, And I'm from England, that's saying something! What are you some kind of green mutated chimp? If you wanna know who's more evil, I just kicked a kid with a limp! Santa Ho Ho Ho! Well I guess it's that time of year, When all the downers come out and try to steal Christmas cheer! You better watch out because now Santa is here, And I'm rocking a sleigh and eight tiny reindeer! 'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, Santa wiped the floor with the old man and the green man with the words out his mouth! These yuletide rhymes are prime with a side of cookies and milk! You're dropping rap that'd make a Christmas tree wilt! I'm built 4'10" and 404! You're nothing, I'm something and everybody knows, My bowl full of jelly starts to jiggle and roll, And I'm so full of flow, these buttons are about to go! Elf Gigantic, his frantic antics, coming out of every stereotype you can't plant it! Cool nicknacks, plastic packs, with a lactic act so whack, you can't crack! Pacific to Atlantic, it's his tactic! That's the knack, no slack! Santa Making spastic tracks in my boots, Elastic! You might hate on Christmas, you might hate on Chris Kringle, But you know you're just jealous because you're lonely and single! Look at you two, you're both just greedy little boys! I wanna exile you both on the Isle of Misfit Toys! You try to pretend like you're as cold as ice, But I've checked my list twice, it turns out you're both nice! Despite your cold heart and despite your disguises, You made peace with Bob Cratchit and your heart grew 3 sizes! Now you both work for me, so get back to the shop! Little Suzie wants a doll and Tommy wants a laptop! Now I'm in charge here, so I'm stopping this fight! Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night! Who won? Scrooge The Grinch Santa Category:The Grinch Category:Ebenezer Scrooge Category:Santa Claus